The Despair Pranks
by Junko's Assistant
Summary: Each chapter contains a different prank/situation Junko Enoshima may be put into. Made completely out of whatever comes to mind at two in the morning. Read at you own risk. Rating may change in the future as well as writing style and possible POV change.


Junko Enoshima sat up in her cozy bed on a warm Sunday morning. She stretched her arms up to the ceiling a put on a huge grin.

"Good morning, bastards!" Komaeda groaned sleepily from where he was hanging suspended on her pink walls, and Kamakura stayed curled at the foot of her bed as he always did. Junko then bounced off her king sized bed and began to strut down the hall in her monobear footy pajamas as usual.

As she passed the doors of all her other classmates, she noticed it was a little quieter than normal. And as she entered the main living room of the mansion they all lived in, it was clear that nobody was present. Shrugging, she plopped herself down in front of the TV and turned on her favorite anime, 'Dangan Ronpa'. Because why the fuck not.

Suddenly, the door slammed open, and standing in the doorframe was none other than Kirigiri.

"Hello, I am your neighborly neighbor that has come to neighbor."

Junko blinked and stared straight into her purple soul, dropping the remote in surprise. But before she could react, Togami came running down the stairs smiling happily.

"Good morning dear! I assume you slept nicely!" He walked at an Ishimaru-like pace over to Junko and gave her a huge, despairingly wet kiss on the lips before sitting next to her, throwing an arm around her shoulders. Junko, of course, spit it up as fast as she could and stared at him in disgust.

"What the fuck are you idiots doing?!" She yelled, but it was too late. It had already begun. A quiet voice rang from the hall as Chihiro came running into the living room, her phone in hand.

"Mom, look! I found the sex toy I want for Christmas!" Junko didn't even have time to answer before Chihiro took a seat on her lap, shoving the phone in Junko's face. Junko's grabbed her wrist and dragged her onto Togami, who gave her a hug.

"Really sweetie? Show mommy and daddy so we can spend even more of our never-ending money on you!" Junko shook her head in disgust and began to back up, when something above her caught her eye. That idiot Naegi was hanging from the chandelier by his ahoge with the straightest face she had ever seen.

"What the fuck are you doing, hope dweeb? Those things are despairingly hard to get up there and you fucking know it!"

Naegi looked down at her calmy and said, "I am the hope acorn."

Junko opened her mouth, then closed it again. "I'm not sure how to respond to that, kid." Celestia's voice then rang out behind her, making her cringe.

"MOM, TWOGAMI'S SPREADING RUMOURS ABOUT ME WITH HIS FATASS FRIENDS AND HIS FATASS DOG." Junko was forced to look at her phone as well as Celestia forced her back against the wall, then hugged her tightly. "FUCKING DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT."

"How in hell do you think something like you came out of something like me, you fucking Satanist?!" Junko then bolted for the kitchen, where Hagakure seemed to be waiting in a suit with some shady glasses on.

"Would you like a deflated balloon, Mrs. Enoshima?" He then opened both sides of his jacket to reveal about 94 deflated balloons. It was then that a large, weaboo-like voice rang through the house, belonging to none other than Yamada. Junko held her breath.

"MOMMY~ BAKA MAIZONO STOLE MY SUGOI KAWAII BARBIE." The floor shook as he came bursting through the kitchen, breaking the walls of the doorframe in the process. He picked her up violently as if she were a doll and shook her several times, his hamster face was streaming with tears as she immediately tried to pry out of his arms, but his strength was immense.

"Get off of me, you big ball of fucking misery-!" It wasn't long before she slipped out of his grasp and just barely made it out of the kitchen. She shot through the living room and out the front door, stopping shortly to catch her breath. A whining noise then sounded from behind her.

Turning around, she saw Mukuro chained to a dog house on her hands and knees. "Sis? Is that you..?" As she approached, Mukuro barked let her tongue hang out, expressionlessly. Junko placed her hands on her hips and sighed. "At least one thing makes sense."

Suddenly, and rope was lassoed around Junko's waist and she was almost instantly dragged back into the house. Staring down at her when she was finally released was none other than Togami.

"Honey, your brother is here to visit for the seventh time this week!" Junko looked around, terrified, as Ishimaru came into view.

"Hello sister! Pleasant seeing you again!" His hands were placed sternly on his sides as Junko gave him a confused look. Was she asleep or something pathetic like that?

"What the fuck is going on?!" She cried out. It was then that a cracking sound was heard, and before she could register what was going on, Naegi fell from the chandelier and landed flat on top of her, making her wheeze in agony. When she opened her eyes, he had his nose pressed in between her boobs. His voice was muffled as he spoke.

"The hope acorn has fallen and is ready to bloom." Junko spit on his broken ahoge and untangled herself, letting him fall between her legs when she sat up.

"Who the fuck do you people think you are?!" Junko yelled. A hush then fell over everyone in the house, and Togami stepped forward.

"Enoshima-Sama? Are you okay..?" He spoke quietly, but it wasn't his voice. Suddenly Junko's eyes opened and she shot up in her bed. She was breathing roughly when Naegi tapped her shoulder once again.

"Enoshima-Sama, are you okay? You've been screaming for the past hour." Junko rubbed her neck and stared at her blankets, groaning.

"I just had an awful nightmare… You bastards were all acting like completely different people." Naegi smiled and shook his head.

"That sounds awful. I hope you're okay now, though!" Junko nodded carefully and sat up, but as she looked down to put on some shoes, she noticed Naegi was standing in a pot. She gave him an intense glare.

"I am the hope acorn."


End file.
